Valuable Life Lessons

From Deadspin, a drunk employee from the Tampa Bay Times Forum lets fans in on some secrets:

Let me be the first to tell you, as an employee of the Tampa Bay Times Forum, that the management does not give a fuck about anybody.
I am currently nine beers in (Natural Ice because I'm cheap and in college, and it's got 5.9% ABV). I have 50 minutes before I need to clock into work. I think it's funny how arenas and stadiums try to tell their fans that the ultimate goal is to make life easier; where to go for their seats, where to find Outback and where to find the discount stations. My superiors never have told me any of this. But I can disclose a few secrets for hockey-goers' sake:
1) The Tampa Bay Lightning sell 24 oz. beers on the plaza, before you enter and before you go through security. The vendors sell them out on the plaza, so when one goes through security, they're casually asked, "Did you buy that here?" Of course you did. Long story short, buy a 24 oz beer, five of them for 6 bucks at a gas station and carry them in and you're gold. Better yet, use the can and fill it up with straight Jack Daniels and you're still all right. Searchers can't sniff or examine your can. Please, bring the liquor in, it'd make my job easier.

This is followed by another obvious fact: Hot women get all the breaks.  It is rather humorous, but I would imagine the email writer might get in trouble if Nick reads the story.